I have recently changed the picture on the front of my blog and also the title, to Positive Vibes. Not sure yet if that is the name I will keep, I haven’t yet figured out what name to give this blog now. I am still going to be writing and sharing my experiences, in a positive way, and rediscover my authentic self.

Now that I have turned 50 – where did the time go, I realise a lot of the stresses and worries I experienced when I was younger, as a daughter, sister, friend, bride, wife, mother, girl friend, teacher, child carer, co worker seem to have disappeared. I listen to others, watch others struggle and wonder in amazement that my life has reached a new stage, where stresses and worries as I used to know, are no longer significant. I wish I could share what I have learnt to lessen the pain, suffering and growing of others, my children, friends and those I care about, but I am not able to articulate clearly, so am going to share some thoughts, in case my thoughts help others in some way.

The change for me, from worry, stress, depression and anxiety (high functioning) coincided with Pete coming into my life, there is no doubt about that. I also think stopping drinking (I was also a high functioning alcoholic) and smoking, changed the ‘brain whirl’ – the negative voices in my head that so shaped who I was and how I dealt with life. Owning my own home, or at least paying off my own home, having a garden a home where I can dig a hole, hang a picture, make it my own, our own, is another big part of the picture.

Maybe it’s just age, time of life, the way things work, but whatever the reason, I count my blessings every day and am grateful to have reached a place in my life where as well as being positive, and grateful (I have always been a Pollyanna glass half full kinda gal) I am happy, at peace with things, and while Pete, and my friends in Boorowa may disagree at times, I am not as bossy, highly strung or crazy as I have been in my life.

I am still a hippy, quite happily so, I still adore my kids and wish only the best for them in their lives, I still want to teach, I want to learn, make and do. Maybe it’s an absence of drama or a refusal to get drawn into the drama that is one of the tips I can share. Living in a country town doesn’t mean there is no drama, or that people don’t from time to time create drama (at work too). The difference is I now ignore all that stuff, and get on with the joy of living.